Feeling down?
Feeling sour?
Take a look around!
Have a cuppa with ME...

Friday, June 10, 2005

every night, reflecting everything in my life, i just cant help letting my tears out. i've been trying my best to look brave, as if nth happen. But, when d night falls, it shows the real me. d darn vulnerable weak side of me. i might say, i wanna be alone.. i dont need anyone to love me. But, e fact is, i really need someone to comfort me in her arms. Someone whom i can share my probs, burden n everythin in life. Someone who motivates me in whatever i do. Sigh, but, i've found no one. when everything seemed so right when suddenly turned out to be unexpectedly wrong. why do i still treat her so nice when i knw she dont love me anymore, n i might hv e high probability of fallin real hard whn she will eventually like someone else? why things always turn out to be the way i dont wish to. sigh. i'm just a fool. the biggest fool on earth..

sunday n she'sleaving to NZ for her ballet scholarship. comes back on the 21june.. I'm gonna miss her so much.. reluctantly i hv to let her go, its for her own gd. been counting the days till i can see her again.. -slap self- wake up! she dont love you anymore!! stop pestering her and make urself an irritant DUMB! sigh.. when can i ever stop crying for u? ... asking myself umpteen times. I really dunno... every night, i had the sweetest dream.. i dont wanna wake up.. cuz whenver i wake up, i dont see u my side. i dont want just a dream, i want u in reality. I knw i hv to face the fact that u left me, n i knw i hv to let u go in order for u to be happy.. sigh. other part of me keeps holding on, refusal to let go and the other part of me wants to let u go cuz u'll be happy.. u knw, i hate you. I hate you for leaving me all alone, i hate you for not giving me another chance, i hate you for not accepting my past, i hate you for everything!! but, i love you.. sigh. this love just suppress all my hatred for u.. i'll most willing to provide u w unconditional love, overlook everythin, be there for you as long as you need me. But will you ever acknowledge that? I guess not...

my result's out. and i cant log in to check my results, dammit! -cross my fingers-


posted by chapter at 3:25 PM :: comment link here

About Me

Name: Yu Hui
Birthday: 24th December 1986
Am addicted to white mask and CK Be
I am what i am. Reality aint my cup of tea
Mushrooms anyone?
No doubt i love my loves
I'mma stuborn freak, i won't deny that

I've learnt the hard way

I'd rather walk away

If a picture paints a thousand words, then shut up and paint!

Smile is one of the most mesmerizing part of thy soul. It captivates one's beauty.

The eyes are the window of your soul too. It speak volumes. It says, i'm hungry.



Some things are better left unsaid...


I'll not make e same mistakes that you did
I'll not let myself cause my heart so much misery
I'll not break e way you did
You fell so hard
I've learned e hard way, to never let it get tt far
Because of you
I never stray too far from e sidewalk
Because of you
I learned to play on e safe side
So I don't get hurt
Because of you
I find it hard to trust
Not only me, but everyone around me
Because of you
I am afraid
I lose my way
And it's not too long b4 you point it out
I cannot cry, bcus I know that's weakness in your eyes
I'm forced to fake a smile, a laugh
Every day of my life
My heart can't possibly break
When it wasn't even whole to start with.. Seems like just yesterday, you were a part of me
I used to stand so tall, I used to be so strong
Your arms around me tight, everythin it felt so right
Unbreakable, like nth could go wrong
Now I can't breathe, no I can't sleep
I’m barely hangin on
Here I am, once agn
I’m torn into pieces, can't deny it, can't pretend
Just thought you were the one
Broken up, deep inside
But you won't get to see e tears I cry
Behind these hazel eyes
I told you everythin, opened up n let you in
You made me feel alright, for once in my life
Now all tts left of me is what I pretend to b
So together, but so broken up inside
Cause I can’t breathe, no I can’t sleep
I’m barely hanging on.. I'm so afraid tt you're saying it's over
It's e last thing tt I wanna hear
But if your heart's not in it, for real
Pls don't try to fake what you don't feel
If love's already gone
It's not fair to lead me on
Cuz I would gv e whole world, for you
Anythin you ask of me, I'd do
But I won't ask you to stay
I'd rather walk away
If your heart's not in it
You say tt you love me
But baby sometimes
You're just sayin e words
If you've got smth to tell me
Don't keep it inside
Let it b heard
I'm so afraid tt you're sayin it's over
Girl I'll make it easy for you
If your hearts not in it, for real
Pls dont try to fake what you don't feel
If e loves already gone
It's not fair to lead me on
Cause I wld gv e whole world, for you
Anythin you ask of me, I'd do
But I won't ask you to stay
I'd rather walk away
If your hearts not in it..


_Shout Out ta me_


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